10 Ways Every Nigerian Student Reacts After Checking His/Her

I went to school today and I saw part time students
clustered around the department result board. I noticed
their reactions, expressions and body language and this
motivated me to induce it into writing
These acts/reactions are not only peculiar to my school
students but also a generality/large percent of other
students across our tertiary institutions
1. They Refer To A Lecturer As Being Mean
After checking their semester results, they amazingly
keep their mouths widely opened like someone who lost
his Bet9ja ticket. They will analyze how cheap the
questions were; how they finished before time; and how
they attempted all the questions correctly. They will
blame their lecturers saying they barely crown the effort
of students no matter how they answer their questions
correctly, if not, they ought to have been graded an "A"
2. They Leap Praises On Themselves
Just because the y were fortunate to hit high scores
while others did not, you will see them walk-bouncing
and parading the class, raising shoulders and praising
themselves just to intimidate others that did not
perform so well
3. They Start Crying
As we know thatI observe that guys barely cry after
checking their results, but the ladies deserve a standing
ovation for this. After checking their results, they will
place their hands on their heads crying and sweating
profusely as if they just lost a relative. They will keep
checking every five minutes expecting their grades to
change miraculously
4. They Put Blame Invigilators These ones will always
blame their failure or low grades on the strict
invigilators who prevented them from girraf-ing, or
communicating with their friends, and/or insufficient
time. if not, they ought to have scored at least a/an "A"
or "B". When they score " or F", they will say, so this
man gave me D despite what I wrote; but when they
score "A", they will say that is what they deserve
5. They Will Cross Out Their Names
These ones will check their results and would act like
they have passed but will come back later at night to
cancel their names and grades
6. "Thank God I Did Not Carry The Course" Crew
These ones will go straight to d end of their results to
see if there is any carry over before even checking
grades proper. You will see them go on their knees
singing praises to God that they narrowly escaped
CARRY OVER. I call them LET MY PEOPLE GO crew
7. They Check The Grades Of Other Students
The ones might have crammed the matric numbers of
most students must while some might have even
compiled the list of all students in a piece of paper and
will bring it along with them when result is released.
You will see them come under the disguise of checking
their results, when if fact, they are checking that of
other students.
8. They Console Others
These ones will check their results without even saying
anything. Either they fail or pass, no one knows.
You will see them consoling their colleges who have
failed.
9. They Stay Miles Away From The Result Board
They will come and stay few miles away from the board
waiting for other students to vacate the board before
they check theirs. This is because they are not sure of
themselves and they don't want the breeze to expose
the anus of the fowl
10. Feel free to add the last one
I drop my pen at this point
Thanks for reading